Monday, April 13, 2009

No Honorary Degree!!

Help! The world is ending! A college refused to give our worthy, African-American president an honorary degree!!

You know, it's pitiful.

Why, when there are so many other important things to worry about, are we worrying about a man getting stiffed at a college? In fact, I don't think he even got the bad end of the deal here. Sure, he isn't being awarded an honorary college degree.

Hey, I haven't been awarded an honorary college degree. Help me! Give me an honorary college degree! Discrimination! I've accomplished lots in my lifetime! (I've gotten so much Star Wars trivia stored in my mind, it's amazing!) Unfairness!!

Uh-huh. That's what the Obamabots are up in arms about today.

Apparently Arizona State has given out honorary degrees to commencement speakers since the dinosaur. (They gave an honorary degree to their very first commencement speaker, Larry the Dinosaur, even though he summarily ate the entire committee. It was horrible. Graduation that year was very low.)

Anyway...so, even though ASU has given honorary degrees to various other people (such as scientists on the forefront of research, computer designers, software designers, oil people, newspaper publishers, authors, and the like), they won't give one to our new and dear President Obama.

Personally, I see why not. The guy hasn't even done anything yet.

Kudos for coming up with a catchy campaign slogan. Congrats for mobilizing the majority of American citizens around said catchy campaign slogan. Hooray for getting said lazy American citizens to the ballot boxes to vote for said catchy campaign slogan. I mean...you. (Did I really say that?!)

Oh, and for sending more of our boys to war, wrecking my rights further, trying to ruin our country, and all that awesomeness.

But that doesn't give you guaranteed rights to an honorary degree.

Sorry, Mr. Obama. I guess you'll just have to go back to school to get that degree.

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